boyfriend

things to do while you’re waiting for a text back

I don’t know if they’re abandonment or attention issues, but something is definitely wrong with me. My thoughts always shoot to the worst-case scenario, and this has negatively affected many past relationships.¬†If he’s not texting me back, he’s probably on a date with someone else. Maybe he’s ghosting me. Why’s there a weird emoji next to his name on Snapchat? Did he unfollow me on Instagram?

Aaaaaand that’s just a little taste of how psycho I am. Here’s what I do to come back to normal.

1. Write a blog post.

2. Do some squats.

3. Browse through Tumblr.

4. Call my mom.

5. Go grocery shopping.

6. Knock out some freelance work.

7. Slap on a face mask.

8. Play Words with Friends.

9. Make a cup of coffee.

10. Go on Pinterest and look at wedding photos.

11. Eat a spoonful of Phish Food.

12. Read your entire text history and wonder where you went wrong.

 

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pin-spiration

pin-spiration: valentine’s day

I’ve yet to be in a relationship on Valentine’s Day, but I still enjoy a lot of parts about the holiday. Chocolate? Yep. All-pink everything? Sure. Romantic comedies? DUH! Champagne? Why not?!

I’m planning to bring in some festive, heart-shaped sugar cookies for my coworkers today…and will definitely be hitting the clearance candy rack at CVS tomorrow. Do you guys celebrate V-Day?

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boyfriend, the latest

things that are ruined for me because i shared them with boys

The best and worst part of dating someone is sharing your favorite things and places with them, thus building memories. But when the relationship ends, these moments aren’t so happy anymore and going to your favorite pizza place or watching something on Netflix just reminds you of them and makes you sad. Well, it makes ME sad.

“Brown Eyed Girl” by Van Morrison

Used to be my favorite song to play while I was driving in the summer in convertible mode (all the windows down, sunroof open) in my high school car. Not anymore. Sigh.

My favorite restaurant (Lil’ Frankie’s)

My favorite place in the world. My late-night spot, my hangover helper, my joie de vivre. Carbohydrate Capital of NYC. I love you. I don’t love that I shared you with someone who didn’t love me.

My favorite TV show (The Office)

I’ve loved you for so long…why did I watch you with boys who didn’t text me back? I hate that we compared our favorite characters (Dwight, Meredith & Creed), preferred episodes (all the Christmas ones), and the cutest Jim & Pam moments.

My favorite tacos (Tacombi)

Yeah, there’s a lot of food on this list. But what can I say? I know how to eat.

 

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boyfriend

weird things you (i) think about when you (i) start dating someone

1. What’s the one thing I do that will make him never text me again?

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2. If I’m not his top friend on Snapchat, who is?

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3. Is he still using Tinder? Should I still be using Tinder?

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4. When am I supposed to start insisting to pay for dinner?

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5. Am I the only person he’s dating?

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6. Where is this going?

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7. When things end, is he going to unfollow me on Instagram?

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8. Why am I psychotic?

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boyfriend, the latest

the (most important) men of ‘sex & the city,’ ranked by me

Thanks to a new Amazon Prime membership, I recently binge-watched all six seasons of¬†Sex and the City.¬†(No, I don’t have a life.) I’ve always been a fan of the show, but watched it rather sporadically, enjoying a re-run here and there instead of following it serially. Regardless, my recent bingeing and seasoned dating experience have given me a fresh perspective as to which men are worthy and which are trash.

1. Smith Jerrod

Smith did NOT get enough air time. Hotness aside, he was hands down the sweetest guy in all six seasons of¬†SATC.¬†He stuck by Samantha not just through cancer, but during a relapse with Richard (trash). Not to mention that he was totally unthreatened by Samantha’s success, didn’t care that tabloids thought he was gay, and worked super hard in his own career.

2. Steve Brady

Another under-appreciated gem is bartender Steve, who Miranda is literally so rude to until the last season. It was pretty inevitable that they would end up together, since they had a kid and all, but it’s impossible not to melt when Steve tells her that she’s “the one” at Brady’s birthday party. Also, Miranda totally dismissed him for wanting to be a career bartender, and in the meantime he opens his own super successful bar.

3. Harry Goldenblatt

I’ve always been a sucker for Harry – the reason for his mid-range rating is because he wouldn’t marry Charlotte unless she converted to Judaism. I believe in soulmates and true love, but that really might have been a deal breaker for me. Regardless, he’s super sweet to her, despite how embarrassed she is of him when they first start dating. I love an underdog, and Harry is the ultimate.

4. Aiden Shaw

I know everyone loves Aiden, but there were some red flags about him from day one. He wouldn’t date Carrie because she was a smoker, and TBH he was pretty rude about it. The relationship was a low point for Carrie as well, since she cheated on him, but I always thought Aiden was pretty immature. He was constantly threatened by Big (maybe rightfully so), which came off as petty and childish. Oh, and he nearly booted Carrie from her apartment.

5. Trey MacDougal

Pretty bad. He and his mother were both totally unsupportive of Charlotte’s reproductive challenges, and were annoyingly traditional. Also, he claimed he was a “non-sexual person” and wouldn’t sleep with his WIFE, who caught him getting off to a dirty magazine in their bathroom. The only reason he’s not at the bottom of this list is because he let Charlotte keep that amazing apartment.

6. Jack Berger

Berger is the wooooorst. Threatened by Carrie’s success, listened to frog sounds to fall asleep, and totally hung up on his ex. And he broke up with her on a fucking post-it. Bye.

7. Big

If you’re not a seasoned¬†SATC¬†viewer, you probably think Big and Carrie’s relationship is super romantic. After close and careful analysis, I can safely say that this relationship was damaging and draining for both parties, more so for Carrie. Big obviously had serious commitment issues, but cast Carrie aside to marry 27-year-old Natasha. The only reason he’s not last is that he always encouraged and supported Carrie’s writing career.

8. Aleksandr Petrovsky

Carrie should have kept him as a “lover” and stopped him from moving on to boyfriend status. She candidly told him that she didn’t want to rule out having kids, and he shut her down. He convinced her to go to Paris and left her wandering Chanel and the streets alone. He was rude to her friends, caused her to miss deadlines, and made her eat lunch alone with his ex-wife.

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the latest

when corinne starts being relatable

I’m guessing many of you have been watching¬†The Bachelor, or at least have heard about the juicier events of the season through the grapevine. Enter: Corinne. I was not a fan of Corinne from day one, but was not surprised when, time and time again, Nick continued to give her roses. (Nick sucks.)

Corinne is the kind of¬†entitled person I’ve always disliked. I placed her in the category of people who have wealthy parents to pay for their rent and donate their way into college. Regardless, Corinne’s exit from the show last week was relatable AF.

I remember watching¬†Bachelor¬†in high school and everyone seemed so much older than me and at such different points in their lives than I was–but now, there are contestants who are the same age as me (or just a year or two older), and I can relate to their occupations and relationship histories. Corinne’s speech in the back of the limo was just super relatable…why can’t I have a normal relationship? I just want love the way it’s supposed to be, too!!

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the latest, Uncategorized

another year, another 3 resolutions

Well…2016 is finally coming to an end. I think a lot of people have mixed feelings about this past year–for me, it was definitely a rollercoaster.¬†SO much has changed in the last twelve months. I graduated from college, got a 9-5 job, and moved twice.¬†It’s kind of crazy how unprepared I felt for it all, and how many added responsibilities I now have.

2016 coming to an end has me thinking about where I’ll be this time next year. There are still a lot of things I want to do, like get a Master’s degree and live abroad (maybe I can combine these two…), so who knows if either of those will become a reality over the next twelve months.

This time of year is always overwhelming, between Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s eve, and my birthday (it’s a busy two months!), but I wanted to take time to make a list of my resolutions for 2017.

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1. Have dates with myself. I’ve found myself wistfully scrolling through Instagram and seeing cool gallery exhibits, pop-up eateries, and outdoor installations, yet never actually go to these things–even though tons of them are right here in NYC! I want to make more of an effort to actually¬†go¬†to these kinds of things, even if I can’t find someone else who wants to tag along.

2. Get my finances in order. I started working on this a few months ago when I realized that I have to pay taxes (yay, freelancing!). But I definitely want to get my expenses in order so I can invest and save the rest.

3. STOP CARING ABOUT BOYS! I literally sound like a broken record but I am so sick of spending time and energy on dead-end relationships. I promise to work on this so I can stop whining about it…

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