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why chandler bing is low-key the perfect guy

I still can’t believe that the first time I watched Friends I thought Ross was the cutest guy on the show. In my high school years, I was all about Joey, since he was a famous actor and all, but in college I moved on to Chandler. Cushy finance job? Check! Makes me LOL? Check! Is insecure enough to be desperate? Double check! Here are 8 reasons why Chandler Bing is the perfect man (despite his unfortunate sounding name).

1. He’s funny AF.

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2. His hair is always on point.

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3. He’s not just another finance guy.

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4. He quit his job to pursue his passion.

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5. He always says what he’s thinking.

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6. He’s a great cuddler.

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7. He’s an amazing dancer.

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8. And a great friend.

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Follow new york is my boyfriend on Instagram. 

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anatomy of an acquaintance vs. a friend

I remember my mom using the term “acquaintance” a lot, mostly referring to my elementary school classmates who were loud and messy that she didn’t want me to have playdates with. I feel like I’m in a really weird, transitional time in terms of my social life. My closest friends no longer live in NYC, and while I feel like I’m “friendly” with a lot of people, there are definitely some differences between people you call acquaintances and those you call friends.

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1. It’s normal to have a conversation via email with an acquaintance, but you’re not even sure if you have you BFF’s current email address. That’s what texting is for, no?

2. Instagram comments = for friends (unless you’re drunk and feeling generous).

3. They’re your friend if you tag them in 4 dozen memes on Facebook everyday.

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4. They’re an acquaintance if you don’t feel comfortable talking about your finances with them.

5. They’re an acquaintance if you’d rather not sit next to them on your commute.

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6. Drunk snapchatting is a sure sign of friendship.

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being your own best friend

While recently watching Eat, Pray, Love (not of my own free will) I watched Julia Roberts stuff her face with spaghetti in Rome, by herself. She wanders through India, by herself. I came to the realization that there is a difference between being alone and being lonely.

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taking a romantic walk on the beach, by myself

When deciding where to study abroad, I chose Amsterdam in part because none of my friends were studying here, nor was anybody from my college. I wanted to be enveloped in a totally new experience, thrust into a foreign land where I’d have to fend for myself. And I have. I didn’t hit it off with any of the American students in my program. While I’m invited for drinks or coffee, I will not be extending wedding invites to these people.

This is a similar experience to my freshman year of college–I found it difficult to be myself around people, worrying they wouldn’t like me. While that isn’t an issue now, since I’ve realized I have a kick-ass sense of humor and know how to have a good time, I don’t see the point in wasting energy on temporary friendships. Meanwhile, my closest friends from high school went down their own paths at different schools. Many became part of the world of Greek life, a concept which is lost on me. One of the reasons I was attracted to Fordham was its lack of Greek life; in this or any universe, I am not a sorority girl. And while my friends seem to have made wonderful new friends, I don’t fit into that part of their lives, and they have changed in ways I have not.

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I have become newly grateful for my willingness to be alone. I enjoy going to museums alone, I cook dinner for one, and I am becoming less bothered by eating in a restaurant by myself, or going to a bar alone. I contemplated buying a cheap flight to Milan, since nobody else was interested, and spending the weekend there by myself. I didn’t, mostly to avoid giving my mother a heart attack–a well traveled woman herself, yet she seems to think a serial killer/sex trafficker/radical terrorist is waiting for me in each new city I visit. When my flight was delayed, I sat at the airport bar and ordered a Heineken. I don’t feel like there is something missing–except the bullshit that comes with forced conversations with mere acquaintances.

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On the five hour bike ride I embarked upon today (more on that later), I had a lot of time to think. I’m grateful that I have friends at all…it’s amazing that people can tolerate me for ten minutes, let alone ten years (thanks, Klaud), let alone my entire life (perks of having a sister). While I will probably never fall in love in Bali, shout out to Julia Roberts/Liz Gilbert for assisting me on my journey to total enlightenment. Namaste.

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21

Well, here it is. Finally. In a few short hours, I will reach 21 years of age, a milestone of young adulthood, yet I feel no different than I did on my twentieth birthday, nor my nineteenth. On my 18th birthday, which is supposed to mark adulthood, I registered to vote and bought a scratch ticket (didn’t win anything, obviously). Last year, I hated turning 20 because my age no longer carried the naivetĂŠ of a teenager, yet I still couldn’t legally buy a bottle of champagne. And tomorrow I will be 21, an insignificant birthday here in Amsterdam where the drinking age is 18.

Anyway, I thought I would share with you 21 things I have learned in my humble 21 years of life. There are still many places to travel and countless adventures to be had, but I could not be any more blessed. HBD 2 me.

1. Nobody will ever love you as much as your parents do.

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2. Small talk is a waste of time.

3. So is straightening your hair.

4. When in doubt, have a cup of coffee.

5. People who don’t laugh at your jokes aren’t your friends.

6. Make friends with the bartender.

7. Men’s deodorant > women’s deodorant.

8. The only guy you can trust is your dad. IMG_2562

9. It’s impossible to wash cigarette smoke out of your hair.

10. There’s a reason why three-buck-chuck is only $3.

11. Don’t bleach your hair when you’re 13.

12. Don’t bleach your hair when you’re 20.

13. Money doesn’t make the world go round.

14. ALWAYS have dessert.

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15. Instagram as much as you want.

16. Meditate everyday.

17. Haircuts aren’t worth crying about.

18. Neither are boys.

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19. You can never have enough shoes. (Sorry, mom)

20. Find the right shade of lipstick.

21. There is no better friend than a sister.

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